On Saturday my friend Tegan asked me to pose for the latest range from iamto’b. As you should know by now, I’m always happy to have my photo taken, so was happy to comply.
I was in drawing class and we were working on our projects for an exhibition. I had found a bird cage on the side of the road and brought it in to give to a fellow student (for her bird). My friend was painting a lamp red and trying to figure out what to do with a random bit of red patterned material. She put the piece of material on a classroom stool and the lamp on top of it. I said “Hey look, art!” and stuck the bird cage on top. Our teacher walked past at that moment and said “Great installation, girls! I love it!” It was at that moment I knew, although I had suspected it for a long time; art is a load of wank.
I should specify that I believe modern art is a load of wank. Throughout history art has been a powerful influence, I know that and I don’t deny it. Art helped women gain equality, helped the Nazi party rise to power, pointed out things that were wrong in our society and has sent many a powerful message. Art has been a major influence on politics and history.
I was reading my friend Bec’s blog and she did a post on quotes. One of them resonated with me.
“God expects me to wear the armour that he has given me, not someone else’s.”
This was said by a speaker Bec heard in her current travels. Wow. What a quote!
For years and years growing up I had a problem with jealousy, and I wanted to be anybody but me. I used to try to dress like my friends, do my hair like them, walk like them, talk like them. I’m sure anyone who was friends with me growing up would attest to that. It took a long journey to decide to just be me.
The problem then – who was I?
I realised at that point I didn’t know. But that gave me a unique opportunity afforded to so few others – I could decide. I could choose. Who did I want to be? The honest truth is I’m still not entirely sure, but I set out trying to be the best friend, girlfriend, wife, colleague, sister and daughter I could be. There were those who wanted to hold me back, my boyfriend at the time, friends of mine, but I cast them aside in my journey.
And I learnt a few things. I am someone who is very sensitive, who cannot watch war movies or the news. I am someone who’s laugh is absolutely awful (my husband says my laugh unit is incorrectly installed). I am someone who is very tall and lean and yet can manage to have a pot belly from a big bowl of pasta. I am a redhead (sure, it’s fake, but it’s me). I am fair skinned (as much as I would love a tan). I’m a dork. I’m a little bit gothic and a LOT traditional. I am a sweet tooth. I am not good as domestic things, at cooking and cleaning and sewing. I am a fairly good painter and drawer. I am really bad at keeping a room tidy. I am forgetful, especially when it’s really important like a birthday (or feeding a pet… Sorry fishies!). I am not someone who is volumptuous, as much as I’d like to be. I am not a sport person. I love clothes, hair and beauty. I love people. I am supportive, loyal and fiercely protective.
This is my armour.
Who are you?