On Saturday I attended the birthday party of my two nieces. With their birthdays only a few days apart, they celebrate together and, understandably, that means their parties are fairly big. This year I was amazed, however, to discover that our hunter instincts, and survival of the fittest, are alive and well.
You see, there was a piñata, one of those lovely pink horse ones you buy from Coles or where ever and chock full of lollies. The kind where kids attack the thing until it explodes in a shower of (hopefully wrapped) candy. In this case, the instrument of torture was a carefully selected rolling pin.
The piñata itself survived not an incredibly long time, and my brother in law had the somewhat dangerous job of ensuring whichever kid (ranging anywhere between 2 and 10… although to my knowledge 5 was the youngest person to actually get hold of the rolling pin) was brandishing this weapon of mass destruction didn’t manage to also destroy other children in their path.
A few near misses later, the piñata begins to show it’s first cracks, and the amassed children begin to swarm. One more hit and it’s broken, in a spray of confectionary and pink tissue paper. The kids swarm forward like a bunch of starving sharks at feeding time and IT IS ON.
The candy cleared, the storm slows, and a sea of happily munching children (including a few in tears) begin to disperse.
That is, until brother in law and I released the former unicorn/current appendectomy patient, and dropped it on the ground. Another swarm, this time out for blood. It was very quickly determined that the pink tissue paper covered equestrian contained no further remnants of sugar filled joy, at which point the poor horse became the subject of much beating.
It was my brother in law who commented “It’s like Lord of the Flies!” when a few enthusiastic party goers tore the animal limb form limb, the ringleader only satisfied once it’s skull had become his personal candy bowl, and he carried it with him the rest of the afternoon as a trophy.
As for me? Well, I got away with just a cheezel stained front and a knee covered in vomit, but that’s a story for another time.
What about you? Do you have a funny kids party story? Do your kids make you wonder if you’re secretly living in Lord of the Flies?
This post originally appeared on KiKi & Tea